Language Disaster

New vocabs learned today:
Kondifen - confident
Conditioner - condition

New sentence structures:
I miss at you
I love at you
It's a hurt

LOL. Despite the language disaster, Adnan Sempit 2 is super hilarious. Recommended for stressed people.

Awan Nano

Would you be my awan nano?

It's a Year of Changes

I thank Allah for what has happened earlier this year, it makes me think more on myself, what have I done throughout my ** years living on earth, rather than creating dreams of uncertainties.

Fairy tales only exist for morons. Life is so much more cruel and complex.

Even after quite a long time, it is still uneasy for me. Luckily the faith in God keeps me holding on to sanity.

49:13

"O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that ye may know each other (not that ye may despise (each other). Verily the most honoured of you in the sight of Allah is (he who is) the most righteous of you. And Allah has full knowledge and is well acquainted (with all things)."

This aayah makes me miss US even more. I should’ve used the chance to learn more on its people and culture. Filter out all negative ones and assimilate the positive ones. But isn’t Malaysia a multi-racial country? Let’s get to know each other in a mature fashion and learn how to give and take, not just quarrelling over stupid stuffs. Appreciate the differences.

Hat trick

Tonsilitis three times in a row. Wow. I guess my antibody level is just too low.

For this third time, I try not to take any medication for building up my own antibody.

I should know when to rest. :(

Finally The 100th

I always enjoy the journey of going back home alone, especially when I board a plane.

My favorite part would be meeting up with strangers and have a long, nice chat with them. This time the encounter was with a business consultant, that has been working with FELDA for quite a long time. So we have a common in that, working in oil palm industry. But he's more to management while I'm more on the technical aspect. The conversation went on smoothly and interestingly that I didn't realize fifty minutes had just passed away like that.

I won't forget his advice, "Learn as fast as you can. Ask for work from your boss. Don't wait for him/her to give instructions to you." Well, this is what I need after been working for two months diligently. A motivation booster.

Oh God, I still have so many dreams that haven't come true. May Allah grant me an understanding partner in the future.

Friday Night Rant

After all that happened, I truly don't know if I can fix the situation. Sometimes it's awkward; other times it's exciting, thrilling.

I only pray that Allah will lead me in everything that I do. In every decision that I'm going to make. If Allah says it's meant to be, it is meant to be.

Lately

Incompleteness surrounds me. Something's missing. My third level of Maslow's Hierarchy of Need is not fulfilled.

Maybe I should start working towards that stage of life.

Another Dream

"Move as swift as a wind
Stay as silent as forest
Attack as fierce as fire
Undefeatable defense like a mountain"

-Sun Tzu's The Art of War-

I'd love to learn on military someday.

In the Mood

Today I can finally rest at home. I think this is the first time I'm home during these hours since I moved to this place.

Homesickness level has exceeded its limit. Next Saturday I'll be close to the people that I love the most, mi familia :) Finally a happy thing to anticipate.

Task, Responsibility or Challenge?

So our boss left us, the two new officers in the lab for two days without immediate supervision by upper position as she's attending a meeting outside together with other officers. So in the lab, we're left together only with the technicians and operators. And yes, something did happened.

When I arrived at work today, the technician-in-charge reported that the current went out at the whole lab. We do have an electric generator, but the thing was not working, as from her report, there's still electricity supply, but not enough to cater the huge demand for our lab. There're three switches there (which I myself don't really understand), but according to her, the generator will only be turned on if all the switches went off, but there's one there that's left on. The generator read it as "i am not needed right now as this thing is still on". We called out the electric supplier, and they send a technician to us, but before he arrived at our lab, suddenly and magically there's power supply. So must be the electric supplier's fault in the first place! (Who else is supplying electricity in Malaysia?) From my uderstanding, an electric pole was "affected" in Rawang, which means our area can also be "affected". We're still waiting for the report from the manager in our area. And on the afternoon, the chargeman came to check on the generator and the result is there's nothing wrong with it. So who's fault again?

And, if there's no electricity in our lab, nothing can be done. Laminar flows, culture room, the fridge and everything depends on that. Then we have to think on what to do with the workers. So ajaklah gotong royong. Doing extra cleaning than their daily maintenance procedure. Better than datang kerja makan gaji buta.

It's a bit challenging as it's way out of my knowledge, but I hold a big responsibility there. At least now I know a little better on electricity system in the lab. Somehow I feel like being in a reality TV show where the boss secretly sets up a hidden challenge. If any TV station broadcast such shows, I'd love to join in LOL. Barulah anak-anak muda minat nak jadi saintis. Ni asyik nyanyi-nyanyi je. So now I feel like I really love my job ♥

And friends, thanks for a great weekend :) To Izatul, Cemak, Mira, Rabbit, Muni and Nadia, thanks a lot! It's always great to see familiar faces.

Once in a while

When I stray away from the real path, I thank God for net letting me to be lost.

Just hang in there, Ilham.

Fighting!

Sometimes it's choice, other times it's fate

Two months of being a schoolteacher opened my eyes on real world. How cruel and unjust life can be. It just hurts me so much seeing a bright kid from a poor family not given an equal opportunity as an average kid born with a silver spoon in his mouth. When I was in secondary school, I was not able to see all of these. All I knew was my task is to study in school, and after that I need to attend tuition classes, and if I get good results, I will be rewarded. I never had time to learn about life. But the best student in the school that I taught last two months had no tuition, no reward, but was still able to shine. I really hope he'll get a good education after this.

On the other hand, it also makes me mad seeing students from low income families did not put any effort to improve their family statuses. They were not able to see education as an important tool to change their life, and just treat it as a plain boring stuff. I know that you can still succeed in life if you do not have any certificates, but the route would be arduous. And plus, when you excel your studies, a lot of bonuses like scholarships will come to you. What's more to ask then? And to seek knowledge is a principal order from Allah.

Talk about parents would be even more heartbreaking. Being a form teacher is a tough challenge that brought me closer to these kids and their families. Sometimes these kids do not behave in school because of their own parents' fault. Then come teacher's role to teach them on moral values. There were also parents who sent absence excused letter, giving illogical reasons like repeated sickness just to save their kids from being terminated from school. Come on parents! How can you be so irresponsible?

I just hope all these youngsters will be "insan" someday. A real insan. Your teacher here always prays for the best. And to the government, I think you should raise schoolteachers' pay.

Strange Enough

It's strange how words from strangers can incite you to do something good.

One.
On my way back home from KL, I met this young lady at KLIA bus station. We were waiting for the coach to LCCT. My flight was supposed to be at 2005 and I was already late. I just got out of my aunt's house at KL around 1730, and I have no other choice than taking KLIA Express to the airport, then the coach to LCCT. We sat besides each other on the coach, and chatted for the whole 20-minute journey to LCCT. In that short time, we shared stories and I feel like I've known her for a long time. A nice lady she is. She gave a lot of advice on starting a career and at the same time taking care of the family. She's already married and she sadly has to live separately from her family, due to her job. This "akak" studied at the UK before and she told me on her experiences there while I shared my stories in the US.

Two.
Up in the air, there's this handsome uncle that started the conversation. Looking at the way he dressed up and his face, I thought he's a hostile person, but I was wrong. As he was being friendly, I was lured to extend the conversation. He advised me a lot on not to be lazy while I'm still young. Go explore yourself and be adventurous. This uncle used to be a schoolteacher and he resigned after nine years. He worked at a housing company after that and now have his own business. What I remember the most from his words is that learning is a lifelong process. I was also amazed on how knowledgeable he is. Memang uncle ni sudah makan banyak garam. Our topic ranged from health, agriculture, family, business, politics, and a lot more.

These two strangers shared their contact details and offered me their help regarding anything.

I thank God for making my journey such a wonderful one and meeting me with nice people. I guess Malaysians aren't that bad, huh? And the good part about it is it's FOC :p I guess our country can achieve the Wawasan 2020 if we have more people like this. People that'll support each other and not just bearing grudges or ill-will towards each other. Tak boleh tengok orang sendiri senang. After all, human capital is the most important asset of the nation. And my motivation was at the peak by that time, and hopefully it won't go down after this.

Love people and people will love you :)

Happy Ramadhan.

A Girl's Heart

Masih mecongak masa depan. Terasa mahu jadi suri rumah sepenuh masa. I don't see myself fit in the industry. Tapi, ramai pulak yang akan bertanya nanti. Habis tu belajar tinggi-tinggi, jauh-jauh buat apa? Haih. Parents pun mengharap.

But my ultimate dream is not to be a career woman.

I just want to get married, lead a happy life with my family. Taking care of them. Nanti orang tanya pulak, tak bosan ke macam tu? I don't think I will be bored seeing my children growing up :) Pergi kerja 8-5 everyday will be more boring.

But don't get me wrong. I just love to see perempuan yang berkerjaya and can still take care of her family.

Apa-apa pun, while I'm still single, I should do something beneficial, cause:

"Kerana sesungguhnya air yang statik tidak mengalir akan rosak akibat statiknya ia. Pemuda yang banyak masa lapang tanpa perjuangan, akan dibunuh oleh masa lapangnya itu”

Graduated

I hate this feeling when reality hits me.

What to do with life now?

Semoga Allah permudahkan jalan.

Return to You

Ya Allah ampunkanlah segala dosa-dosaku.

Responsibility

Writing about HeLa cells makes me realize of how big the responsibility as a scientist is. You may want to contribute to people by finding the cure for the diseases, without noticing you've been irresponsible or unethical towards your research subject.

Oleh itu, buatlah research about plant or microbe.(?)

Make Us Proud

The video above shows a debate between Hebah Ahmed, a blogger from muslimmatters.org against Mona Eltahawy, a columnist on Arab and Muslim issues. Both live in the United States, practicing Islam, but they have different understandings on veil (niqab) wearing.

I really like Hebah's last words: "Basically, I want people to know that when I choose to cover this way it’s because I am fighting against a systematic oppression against women in which women’s bodies are being sexualized and objectified. This is a different perspective and a different form of empowerment in which I think when I’m in public, my sexuality is in my control and people have to deal with my brain and who I really am and not judge me by my body. And if we want to really talk about the oppressive situation of women, let’s talk about all the eating disorders, all of the plastic surgery, all of the unhealthy diets that are being done, all in the name of having the perfect body. To me, this is liberating and this is empowering. Mona keeps saying I believe, I believe, I believe, well, we don’t make laws based on what Mona believes or what anybody believes."

Sesungguhnya apa yang tertulis dalam al-Quran itu jelas. Who are we to deny it?

Bismillah

Untuk Aisyah:



Tak sabar nak tengok kamu membesar!